Tuesday, February 21, 2017

Who I was vs who I am

There comes a time in life that creates a strife
where Who you once were is in constant battle with who you are now

I want to be who i used to be careless and free
But times and situations
have changed
and after a few trials hardships and hard learned lessons
I made a vow to be who I need to be now

One voice says,
LET'S GO BACK! It was so much fun before
Walking out the door
Nothing was important
Living carelessly everyday
Doing stupid things all day long
Who cares if something goes wrong

but another says,
this is a new season
And in order to embrace this new season
You need to listen to reason
You cannot do it by being who you were before
And If you try, it will be like commiting treason
Against yourself with no hesitation.

Don't loose your concentration
You've fought long and hard
To lay down this foundation.

Throw it all away for one more day
Of used up thrill and cheap adrenaline?
Or press forward as an improved and better person
With renewed vision and motivation
For a better life of purpose,contentment adventure and satisfaction

This struggle is real
This is how i feel
It was fun while it lasted
But I have to grow up now
And look past it

A time will come when We all have to give up things that we dont want to
But afterwards in return
we get back something much more better and more brand new
This I tell you is true

Dearly departed
The old adventure is over
But the new one
Has only just started

Tuesday, January 17, 2017

GOD, I'm sorry

when I was young I dreamed of a better life
by this time I thought that I would have kids and a wife
but things didn't turn out as planned

I messed up in school
got banned
now I'm an uneducated fool

I became lazy
so I never lasted long enough at a job for them to promote me
I never learned to defend myself
so now everyone walks all over me

how I wish that some day GOD would answer my prayers
so that I no longer feel like I'm living in a loophole nightmare
and make me better
so that I no longer cry when I stare at myself in the mirror

GOD, I'm sorry I've wasted so much of my life
I'm sorry I'm not the person you wanted me to be
but maybe with your grace
there could still be a fighting chance for me
to become the greatness that you see in me

please forgive my sins
as I try to forgive the sins others have done to me
please help me live a better life of peace, abundance, and tranquility

I admit I was in the wrong
I need your grace 
I need your love
to help me repair my life
and be the man
you designed me to be all along

GOD, I'm sorry I hurt you

-Elliott- 

Thursday, January 12, 2017

The American soldier


You sacrifice being away 
from your family for months at a time
So that at any given time
I could be able to spend time with mine



You sacrificed being able to see your first child being born
So that I could witness seeing mine
hearing your child's first word
So that I could hear mine
And having your child walk for the first time into your arms 
So that I could have my child walk into mine



You patrol dangerous borders and fight endless wars on the frontlines and confines of other countries through all hours of the night 
So that back in the states 
 my family and I can sleep peacefully and protected at night



You go into battle 24/7 wearing one uniform all year around
So that I have the freedom to wear whatever I want 24/7 all year around



You've had to suffer 
by seeing the worst that war has to offer
And despite the horrors 
you still manage to have the ability
To get up each day and pray
For the courage and bravery to endure it all again today



I'll never be worthy to wear the uniform you wear
Nor endure the things you endure
But one thing I know to be true
I live in freedom 
And it's all thanx to the great and ultimate sacrifice 
From all the uniformed men and women like you

When we met (super short love story)

I used to think love was a fairy tale

A Thing of detailed fantasy stories 
about love that always prevails


Yes I've had relationships before where I thought I was in love


That's it she's the one there's no-one else

Where I felt that being with this person is a must
But as time went on, I realized I wasn't in love I was in lust

Which is no surprise to anyone that it never lasted
All my relationships always ended up in a relationship casket


But one day, the unpredictable happened. 


I saw you and my heart experienced something new
I couldn't explain it but I felt it rush through me like a speeding comet

It wasn't a lustful desire like I've felt with previous girls
No, on the contrary, it was a feeling of longing, of wanting but not lusting


I didn't know who you were but in seconds your beauty captivated me.

And When you looked at me,
 Your eyes made me feel like I was soaring through the endless skies. 

I couldn't explain what I was experiencing at that moment

But it was something deeper and 

more 
profound

                                               than anything I've ever experienced before

And the reason why that experience was so unexplainable

Than anything I've ever experienced before

Is because at that moment when you looked at me

And I looked at you

You were giving me the same look of awe and fascination


That I was giving you

I'll be there "Dedicated to a special friend of mine".


whenever times get rough and the journey becomes tough
Whenever you feel down and all you can do is frown
Whenever life gets messy and it begins driving you crazy


On the day you feel alone, 
I'll pick you up when you don't have the strength to stand on your own.

When you go through hard times that have been going on a long while
Even if I make an ass of myself,

 I'll try my best to find a way to make you smile

I'll fight along side you.
I'll walk with you
I'll comfort you
I'll protect you
I'll make you smile

this poem is Dedicated to a special friend of mine 
who's going through tough times
I'm here for you