Wednesday, August 24, 2016

Society

one thing about me
is that all my life
Society has always treated me Differently

Since childhood,
ive dealt with Everything from
being picked on because of my shoe size
having girls constantly call me ugly 
people staring for no reason
to being laughed at simply because of what im wearing 

till this day, I just can't understand 
what it is about me that make people react
that way
Everywhere I go, I get the same Dirty looks
and the same smirks and laughter

people who don't know me
assume they know me
and have the audacity
to profile me
and in there mind
make me out to be some kind of monster

its to the point that now sometimes
whenever im around other people
without wanting to, I start getting
panic attacks. even the depths of my soul
begin to tremble

Everytime morning draws near
going out in public has become my greatest fear

they say you got to give respect to get respect.
im sorry, but I kinda find that funny
because no matter how much respect i try to give,
that phrase just never seems to work for me

I Might as well get a Tattoo of a thousand
footprints going all across my back
to symbolize how many times I have allowed
all of Society to outnumber me
slam me to the ground,stomp all over me
then drag me to a dumpster
shove me in it 
and throw me out like crap

and the frustrating thing is, if I stand up
and say, HEY! IM TIRED OF BEING TREATED THIS WAY!
what Happens?
later on somebody wants to walk up to me and tell me
im in the wrong.

the whole world can speak their mind 
the whole world can voice their opinion
but if I speak up for myself
I get told to shut up
and go back to not existing

whats it feel like to always be made fun of my foot problems?

whats it feel like to always be the guy that people just love to laugh at for no reason?

whats it feel like to always be a damn joke to everybody?

whats it feel like to love the ladies so much but no matter how precious I see them or how valuable they are to me. all my life, ive had to constantly have all the ladies call me ugly? to where there was a time in my life that whenever i walked by a mirror I wanted to cover my face in shame and terror

whats it feel like?
picture this

someone with no remorse, pulling the trigger of a high powered state of the art machine gun 
and having 100 Billion bullets shot straight towards your chest 
with no hesitation

but the bullets peirce your heart in slow motion

thats what it feels like.

so I ask 1 question 
can someone,anyone
please explain to me 
how many more times
do I have to Endlessly walk through the fires of Hell

for Society to stop Laughing at me
and Finally take me seriously